Empty Nester

What do you think of when you hear Empty Nest?  For me I think of middle-aged couples converting the last kid’s room into a hobby room (and maybe having a resurgence of friskiness in celebration of their new aloneness?).

A few nights ago, with everyone else asleep, I found myself clicking around a custom bunk bed website.  Oh man they were awesome. I would have loved any of them as a kid- twins over queens, fulls over fulls, L-shaped, low ones with trundles, and loft beds over hideouts.

There’s really nothing weird about me fantasizing about furniture when I should be zonked. My husband and I bought our first home last April and my inner home decorating junkie has been jonesing to make this place shine.   But since we moved here with a 2-year-old and a 6-week-old, eh, the decopage headboards and any other overly ambitious DIY projects have had to wait.

Anyway, as I was imagining how I would arrange the coolness from this site in our home, I was struck by what that signified.  That some day soon I’ll be facing an Empty Nest of my own — no more children in my bedroom.  Wow.  Even writing that just now stirred up all sorts of fluttery stomach stuff.

Call it whatever you like–family bed, cosleeping, sleep sharing; for me this has been my favorite and simplest of the famous Baby Bs.  I definitely never planned it; we had a gorgeous nursery right across the hall like most expectant couples.  But from bassinet to twin and several funny iterations in between (I’ve heard this lovingly called “musical beds”) , this scenario has worked for our family, and I will mourn it when it ends.

I’m going to enjoy it for now.  My 14-month-old giggles in his sleep sometimes. I need to file that away for later. Some nights, when he is restless, he will throw an arm out, and when that fat fist makes contact with me I feel his whole body relax and his breathing slow.  My 3-year-old talks about his working Dad all day, and I know that having his bed pushed up beside  Dad at night reconnects them.  These days, and nights, are short.

Our relationships will evolve and change again and again.  Soon I will honor their nighttime needs in a different way by creating a new nest, a bedroom for them to share.  Perhaps I’ll let them choose some novelty sheets with Buzz Lightyear on them that do not in any way fit into my fantasy design aesthetic, and I’ll smile anyway.

Rebecca is a wife and mother living in a town brimming with to-die-for antiques and home decor… which she admires from the sidewalk while she wheels her enormous double stroller past. 

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One thought on “Empty Nester”

  1. I feel the same! My little man has just started to love his room (and his Spiderman sheets). He starts out there, but every night I hear, “Mommy, can I come in?” I don’t look forward to the day it doesn’t happen.
    My almost 2 daughter prefers her own sleeping space, but loves to snuggle in the morning. It’s my favorite time…time for just us. 🙂

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